July1, 2006

Hello again! Hopefully I will be better at posting now. It was hard to post when there were so many things in the works - but the time was not right to share. It was better to stay away from the computer than to post too early.Well - my little boy is on a very big boy trip. My "baby" is 2100 miles away in California with Gramma & Grampa Spiess.Nate buddy - Mom really, really misses you!! I do hope that you are having a great time and remembering to be good for Gramma & Grampa (and Uncle Tommy).Well, today I woke up and decided that it was time to get the good wishes done for the quilt group I joined. I got up a little before 9am and have worked on them all day. It is fun to be a part of this group and see such lovely squares and wonderful wishes coming in the mail. I am looking forward to receiving all of the squares for "Kenzie's" quilt. Gramma Spiess has offered to sew them together - yippee! I know she will do a much better job than I ever could. Thanks Mom!Many have asked - why an older child? Why not a baby? Why a special needs child (and especially a complex heart defect) and not a healthy child? The answer to both is hard to explain. Why would we choose a child with a medical need? Why would we risk heart ache? The only answer I can give is that from the moment I laid eyes on this little girl - I felt and knew in my heart of hearts that she was our daughter. There were times I doubted, like when other families committed to her - but somewhere deep down I just knew. Glen knew too. We knew that Wang Cong was our Mackenzie the same as we knew the child I gave birth to was our Nathanael. We had a very real scare in that Nate was classified as "high risk" for Down's and Spina Bifida. We consented to the amnio so we could be prepared - regardless of the outcome we knew that child was our son - there would have been no "terminating" him. It has been the same with Kenzie. From the moment we saw her we knew she was ours - when we found out the extent of her heart defect - she was still ours. It hurts my heart to know she will have to continue to wait for us another 3-4 months. When the time is right though we will be in China being united with this daughter of our hearts.Kenzie - my sweet girl, Mommy and Daddy are coming very soon. Stay healthy, we love you!! ~T